Tuesday, February 23, 2010

this is a real story about a person very close to me..she is a middle aged woman now, and she told me long ago that "when it really matters, you're really alone"..after a rough few weeks i thought about her and wrote this for her..for the record, she never found what she needed..


Love don’t last and friends don’t stay
Empty promises fade away
Tears roll down with no one to see
A lonely heart alone it sleeps.

On a day so blue, and skies so grey
I look at the photos on the wall
A group of friends smiling wide
They don’t resemble reality at all.
A song I hum along so much
Of joy, of fun, times low and high
Of seasons in sun and splashes in rain
But like seasons, the good times pass on by.

A desperate search for a human face
Who would stand by me till the end
In joy or sorrow in sickness or health
Someone to be my true friend.
The journey of life has taught so much
Naïve expectations better not made
For every person breathes selfish desires
When it truly matters, you’re alone, its said.

Often I found someone to trust
Often a fool while giving all to them
Needs fulfilled, they walked away
Leaving behind only the pain.
Words of faith and care misused
In shallow smiles they enticed me
Now words lay broken without love
With a wounded trust left to bleed.

The smiles in photos look ugly
Like corpses of betrayal and sin
Inhuman face of cherished friend
Leaves me terrified within.
Twenty years I search and fail
For a friendship stronger than storms
Twenty years I bruise and bleed
In false promises and fake bonds.

Through the years my mind gets jaded
With thoughts of a cursed destiny
Am I disturbed or just depressed?
Alone forever meant to be.
So it seems that love don’t last and friends don’t stay
The empty promises fade away
Tears roll down with no one to see
My lonely heart alone it sleeps.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010


this is a rough sketch of an idea..i did not find enough time to edit and restructure the verses..so im putting it up in its rough form..well its my blog, and its my voice..rough or smooth, deal with it..

Born in a world, ruled by sons
A girl has no place to be
She grows up to be like a boy
Her fading feminity..

But alas a girl, her soft emotions
A prince comes and steals her heart
She sings, she swoons, all in love
Together, to never be apart..
She trusts him blind, and puts her faith
She grows her hair and finds her grace
He makes her feel loved and cared
And holds her close to keep her safe.

But he is a boy, and doesn’t know
How easy it is to break her trust
He goes about owning the world
And ignores her tears that wet the dust.
People around praise him for all
A boy can be anything he wants
But she gets disapproved for her love
Every step their judging eyes haunt.

The girl now alone, the boy has gone
She smiles and hides her wounded soul
she fights for her place in a boy’s world
as slowly her heart turns cold.
She finds friends who give her love
She bonds into a stronger ally
Times spent with them so pure
She moves past all truth and lie.
But she is a girl and it is a fault
If she finds a friend in a boy
Judging eyes return to haunt her
Prejudiced opinions steal her joy.
A girl and boy mustn’t be close
She is warned by ladies that its too bold
She rolls her eyes and pays no heed
Till she hears them say her morals are sold.

She has stepped into a world of men
While traditions bind her down
daughters and sons have all forsaken her
while she hides behind the tears of a clown.
For she is a girl forever at fault
Fighting critics her strength is torn
Her love, her friendship both so stained
Days and years she fights alone.